Sunday, December 26, 2010
“She looked at him and said
‘I know I totally bored you. I am so stupid’
‘No! You can never bore me’ he said smiling”
She was packing her stuff and smiling because she had had the most marvellous three days of her life. She started stuffing in her iPod and the two fat novels in her bag giggling, she had brought all this stuff because she would be totally bored and these three days were given her as a bonus to relax. The truth was the three days had passed by, every part of her body ached from all the dancing and running around all the time and she never really got the time to relax.
Her dad’s silver jubilee celebration was in the city she had lived in when she was a kid but never visited again and now she had landed at the airport and she was ready for all the pathetic socialising that she knew she would have to do. She hated talking to unknown people, the first day went by as expected, she didn’t like anyone, but things came around the 2nd day and by the 3rd day she didn’t want to leave the place, no matter how happy she was going home and she didn’t want to go. She had come back to her room early with her family because they had to pack as they were to catch the evening flight back home. As much as she hated packing she was happy to go home and was looking forward to some sleep and she knew right now sleep was the only thing she needed. Sleep deprived, she was cranky and chose not to talk to anyone.
As she was packing, her dad walked in to the room and told her that some other batch mate of his were coming to visit them for some time, as they were currently living in that city. She made a face and then the endless series of cribbing started and the whole cranky, whiny side of hers came back, she didn’t want to meet anyone anymore, she was drained of her socialising skills, moreover drained of putting up that friendly smile when inside she didn’t feel that happy. Listening to her daughter whine like a kid, her dad said
‘don’t behave like that, their son just cracked the most difficult exam of mbbs and just got admitted in one of the best colleges of the country, we should all congratulate him’
Her dad said that and left. ‘the best college?, pfft...yes! ok! He got into your college, no big deal!’ she thought to herself and resumed packing. They both were child hood buddies and yet she had not seen him in years. She looked at her mom and said.
‘I am just greeting them and then coming back into my room’
Her mom gave a helpless nod, she knew she was being unreasonable and illogical but she couldn’t help her feelings.
After a few minutes she heard a lot of noise outside and she knew that the ‘guests’ had arrived. She rolled her eyes and continued packing. She wore her jacket and was going towards the bathroom to make her hair when she passed the main door of the room and from the door she stole a glance of supposedly ‘the intelligent future doctor’ who was sitting on the railing. She looked at him and she gasped, she walked in to the bathroom incoherent, all she could think about was him, he was so cute that she something rushing inside. She properly made her hair, walked to her room and sat there still breathing heavily. She waited for her mom to call her out because honestly she didn’t have the courage to go outside. And just then her mom called her out; she took a deep breath and with a smile walked out. She greeted everyone sitting and then again looked at the guy, yes he was real and yes he was unbelievably cute. She was standing answering the interrogative questions thrown at her by his parents; she smiled throughout and answered them.
Then uncle said
‘beta, come sit’
She looked at the guy still sitting on the railing and somehow the guy understood her look and shifted a little to make room for her. She smiled inside but was composed from outside and sat down with him, there was an awkward sense of air surrounding the area, they both didn’t talk and their parents couldn’t stop yapping, he looked at her and she looked at him from time to time and she had to talk to him, just as she was about to say something, her dad did, he asked him about college, how it had changed, how he was finding it blah blah...she wasn’t interested in all of that, all she concentrated on was his voice which just matched his looks. ‘perfect’ she thought.
The awkward silence between them was back again and then she finally gained the courage to ask him the question
‘So what is your name?’ she asked him
He was caught by surprise, he just gave her startled look and somehow he had not expected her to talk to him. She knew his nickname but she wanted to know his real name. Her question was answered by his mother
‘arre, you should be knowing the answer to that question because you only kept his name’
Now! She was startled, both of them didn’t know what to speak next and this time she just couldn’t stop the smirk that formed on her face, how could she keep his name? She was still in school and he had joined college. She was confused.
‘You kept his name because you are an year older to him’ aunty said again
‘Oh!’ was the only thing that came out of her mouth. Seriously, he was younger to him, now that made her laugh.
Although, it was pretty shocking for both of them but the awkward silence broke and he asked her name and then when she found a good chance, she asked him if he wanted to go for a walk and he agreed. They both rushed outside and started walking
‘I am so glad to be out of there, it was getting so weird there’ she said
And the guy just nodded
For the next two hours she was going on talking and in between she talked really insane stuff which she didn’t realize that she was doing. He didn’t say much but contributed to the conversation just a little bit, he would also start talking when something was common between them and she just searched for common topics because she wanted to hear his voice. They both never halted, they both kept on walking, they walked for two hours and it was perfect. The way he looked at her and his smile, there was only one word in her head ‘perfect’. The guy was perfect. If she could fall for someone in two hours then it was him. Her time was up with him when her parents called out to them and told her it was time to leave, she couldn’t believe her time was really up with him. But the one thing that mostly bothered her was that she had talked complete lunatic stuff and she didn’t know what he was thinking about her, to clear out things, she made her cute face and said
‘I am so sorry, I know I bored you, I am stupid’
He looked at her and replied
‘No! You can never bore me’
The both looked at each other for a long time and then she jerked, did they really build a strong connection in 2 hours? Was it possible? She cleared her head and smiled
‘It was nice meeting you, keep in touch’ she said
‘Pleasure was all mine and I will’ he said and smiled
She sat in the car and she was off to the airport, she left the city where a new story had just begun for her.
‘From then till now, two years have passed since that day, since that time, two years have passed since she saw him and she still feels the same way about him as she used to, hoping for something to happen between them, hoping for impossibilities to finally vanish and things don’t seem to be going anywhere’
P.S tomorrow would be that same day again when she met him two years ago.
Friday, December 3, 2010
'I looked at you through the mirror, I saw a different you, I felt something breaking inside me and I never searched the answers for that 'why''
The night seems to never end and there are too many memories to cherish and to forget. There are too many thoughts that keep on reminding me of the loss I suffered and the happiness I gained. If only life was a story which started with once upon a time...and ended with happily ever after...if only it had the prince charming on a white horse coming to rescue you from that evil witch. Sometimes time has limitations and sometimes it seems to pass by, sometimes life seems to move so quickly, sometimes it just stops. Everybody knows the beginning but ending no one has seen, the anticipation of what’s coming next keeps us going. Even if we are sad and depressed the idea a better tomorrow keeps us alive.
All of us yearn for a fairytale life, a castle with lots of rooms, a beautiful gown and magic all around. But then I think, what is magic? What makes magic real? Why do we believe in it so much? Does it happen? Do dreams really come true? Do we all have fairy godmothers? Someone, somewhere waiting for us to pray for some miracle and so that certain someone can swing the wand in its hand and grant us our wish, make us believe in magic again. Are there really two ways to life? Either we be patient and wait for magic or we make magic happen for us. Answers don’t really matter what matters is that there are questions. Questions that are unanswered and in our quest to find these answers would we embark on a journey so beautiful, so magical that we would forget about reality, that we would forget the concept of black and white and just for once believe in colours.
In a world where pain and sorrow surrounds us, a world which forces us to close all doors to feeling any kind of emotions, a world where if you are not strong then you can’t be happy. In every 10 people, there are those 7 living two lives, portraying the world happiness but inside they are dying. What is happiness? How can a person in true sense said to be happy? Are there any ground rules provided? or is it given in some cheesy fairytale book? Believing in the worst, ignoring what is right infront of us and expecting nothing seems to grant us if not whole then partial bliss.
‘Perception to things is what changes the way we live life’ someone once told me that. Can we really change what is fed to us? We are brought up in our lavish homes, drinking milk and eating cookies, reading storybooks and dreaming. If it weren’t for that we wouldn’t have even had those couple of reasons to be happy that we have with us because believing that good things are somewhere out there is what makes it just a tad prettier.
If there was no good or evil, no yin or yang, no angel or devil, no two sides to the coin, we would have never gained a perception; we would have never learned to look at the positive side. Bad things can either bring you down or bad things can make you stronger, more positive. The theory that ‘good things happen to good people’ is all wrong; the theory actually is that only good people are put through tests to make them strong, to make them gain a perception. If a person hasn’t been through the trials and tribulations of life, then they are not the lucky ones, then they won’t realize when a good thing comes to them and they might just let it pass by. Afterall, lessons learnt in the course of life are the lessons best learnt.
Fairytale ending we make ourselves by the things we learn and by the choices we make. It’s all just part of the plan. If we were born with extreme hatred and love, then why hate when there is so much love still within us?