THE LOST SMILE

'Let the music play till it drowns all the fearful voices in my head. Let me erase that which causes so much pain'


All these vibrant colours 

Of the sky

Asking her to smile

Asking her to walk that last mile

Epitome of happiness, she achieved

Now she falls to the ground

Like a broken star

Peace was taken away

Even the shadow leaving her side

Must she falter while walking?

Must she stumble upon her words?

She do not know

She tried being her own saviour

She tried fighting her own battles

But now she was breaking

Now she was quitting

These conflicting sides

Of her own heart

These deliberations

Of her own head

She couldn’t fathom

Dream a little, she always said

But now she was battling

Those inner conflicts

Struggling to keep those

Flights of fantasies alive

Let her smile, she begged

Make her feel better, she said

For if she fell now

She won’t be able to

Stand again.

TO FRIENDSHIP AND MORE

'Love is nothing but friendship set on fire'


 The phone kept vibrating but he didn't bother to pick it up, he let it vibrate, he was too sleepy. Finally after ten minutes when he couldn't take it anymore he opened his one eye and checked the time, it was 3 am and then he saw the name. It was her, a smile came on his face automatically.

 'hello' he said in a coarse voice
'he is coming, he is coming tomorrow, he is coming' she was shouting on the phone

He woke up with a jerk and then realized what she was saying

 'who is coming?' he asked
 'you know, my boyfriend' she said
'oh really? that is an awesome news. What time is he coming?' he asked happily
 'He is landing around 8 in the evening, you are driving me to the airport' she ordered
 'yes of course I am taking you, I am so happy for you. Finally after two years he is coming' he said
 'yes I know. ok! sorry I woke you up but I was so excited. We'll meet in the evening, we will eat something and then go to the airport' she said
 'yes ok done' he said and then they both hung up

 He couldn't sleep that night. He had just met her an year ago and she had become his bestest friend, the things he couldn't share with anyone, he told it to her. She was the sweetest person and he cared too much for her. He had heard plenty of stories from her about the boyfriend but he had not come to India in 2 years as he was out for some work. And now after 2 years finally he was arriving back and he knew how happy she would be. He cared for her so much that he always told her that the day he came back, he would be so happy for her because he knew how much she loved him. They both had been inseparable in that one year and they had discovered a new meaning of friendship. He had been there for her whenever she needed him and she had been there for him without asking.

 The next evening he picked her up from the metro station, it was a typical winter evening with the sun almost about to set and the street lights lighting up the flyovers and the roads of the city. Today she felt happy, she felt there was magic in the air. They both got down near a restaurant and were walking when he saw the her face all lit up and that smile, that did't leave her face. She looked at him, he looked different today, there was confusion in his eyes yet his smile didn't leave his face, his hand felt awfully warm and secure today and there was a different feeling in her heart. She was happy that she was finally going to meet him but also somewhere her eyes didn't leave her best friend's face.

 They both ordered some food and then sat down
 'you look so tired' he said and started laughing
 'yes I couldn't sleep the entire night, I was so excited. But I look fine right?' she asked panicking
 'you look pretty, don't worry' he said and smiled reassuringly

 She looked at his smile, there was something missing in that today, the smile also looked confusing today. After they ate, they got into the car and were on their way to the airport. There was too much silence in the car, she kept looking outside the window, her heart beating faster every second and she frantically kept checking the watch. He kept looking at her being so fidgety and smiled, she was nervous he could sense and then he felt a feeling that he had never felt with her, he felt a feeling of jealousy, he couldn't understand whether it was envy he felt or something else. He was fighting in his head, how could he be envy? he was not in love with her and he always told her that, he was her friend but then why was this?! this! taking her to him...making him feel weird.

 They reached the airport and there was lot of traffic at the entrance, she looked at him with a doubtful smile and asked
 'Do I look ok?' 'yes, you look very pretty, don't worry' he said and smiled
 She sat there with her face showing all signs of nervousness, her hands clasped kept on her thighs and she was breathing heavily. He kept staring at her like if he even blinked she would vanish. Why was he thinking like that?!

 'you know I am so nervous, but I know all this will go once I see him' she said
 He nodded and then gave her a hug

 She felt nice after the hug, his hug was always so warm, that it made her feel confident, it made her feel that nothing could go wrong in the world.
 'thank you' she murmured without looking at him
 They parked their car and were standing at the arrival entrance. She was holding his hand throughout, she didn't feel like letting go, she was that nervous.

 'Don't worry, you are looking very pretty' he said and smiled

 She looked at him smiling, she smiled back too and she kept staring in his eyes, there was something she read in them, she couldn't understand what it was but there was something in his eyes. In that moment, she tore away her glance from him and looked at the entrance and there he was, her boyfriend walking outside and he had spotted her and he had the biggest smile on his face on seeing her. Her best friend let go of her hand and then she ran towards her boyfriend, she gave him a tight hug and just stood there with him looking at him smiling.

 He saw her running towards her boyfriend, in that moment he felt something breaking inside him, if he could he wouldn't have let go of her hand, he would have just stood there staring in her eyes holding her hand. As soon as he looked at her turning in his direction, he turned to face the other side and a tear drop escaped his eye, he was so happy for her but also somewhere he was sad. He was going through an emotion he had never felt. She brought so much happiness to him and now she was smiling looking at someone else. She turned to spot him, but he had vanished somewhere in the crowd. She saw her hand in her boyfriend's hand and felt strange, that touch was unfamiliar, it was not warm, it was not secure. Her eyes looked everywhere for him but he was gone, she turned too late.

FIX YOU

'He thinks I have loved too much and lost everything, He thinks I have gained just stories to tell and lost my touch with reality and what am I supposed to tell him? Am I supposed to tell him he is right? or Do I just sit and stare silently?'

Ropes of misery
tying me down
Someone open them please
Or in this sea of love
I might just drown

what I can't do
I can't even say it anymore
I don't know how I feel
Then why do you ask questions?
But somewhere I believe
We both seek the same answers

Someone inside me is screaming
Everyone around me has gone deaf
They are happy, they are beaming
Then why do I feel so out of place?
Then why do I feel so alone?

I am losing you, I am losing myself
I want you to walk away
I want myself to finally breathe
I want to go back home

These words that I write
Don't make sense anymore
Every word has a meaning
But suddenly they all seem daunting

There is more confusion than pain
This dark lit path
Never seems to end
I am trying to find some light
I am trying to find some hope

Nothing is forever
Everyone comes and leaves
Then why do you say you'll stay?
Then why do you want to stay?
This love had no future
But memories I hold are not in vain

I will resolve all this haziness
I will find a solution for us
I will make it easy for you
I will help you in finding the
Happiness you deserve
I will fix you...

THE PRINCE'S TALE- ALWAYS

'to love is to be patient'


Professor Severus Snape: misjudged, misinterpreted.

Harry potter had just stepped into the great castle of Hogwarts, he was unknown to the word ‘Magic’. There he found friends, he found his family. Hogwarts was his only home.

He was destined to fight the darkest wizard of all times, he was destined to defeat him and die. There were so many looking at Harry with a hope, so many protecting him, so many dying to keep him alive, but there was one man who did more than protection, he loved harry in his own way.
As the story of Harry potter begins and Severus Snape sets his eyes on the boy, he cannot stop staring and everyone thinks he hates the boy, he is evil. But the famous potions master of Hogwarts had more to him than just hatred, over the 6 books, Snape shows his own shades and somehow he is always there to protect harry without making it obvious. Harry’s first Quidditch match, Snape was protecting him, Snape protected him from the dementors, Snape protected him from Voldermort and he loved Harry in his own way.

The biggest twist in the entire series is probably the ‘Prince’s tale’, when all the cards are finally opened, when the truth is finally told to Harry, not only him but all of us get to know the real Severus Snape, a man who didn’t question but just loved. From the moment he had set his eyes on Lily, he was in love with her, she was his only friend, even when she married James, Severus was there loving her. He pleaded Dumbledore to save her, to keep her safe and in return was ready to do anything. The only reason he became an ally to Dumbledore’s army was because of his immense love for Lily.

When Snape is dying and he looks at Harry and says ‘you have your mother’s eyes’ one cannot stop themselves from getting teary eyed. When Harry goes back in his memories, he realizes who he really was, he was a man with so much love and hurt at the same time, he was a man who protected him the most, he was a man with so much courage that he died for love. When Snape hugs Lily and cries his heart out one can understand the torment and suffering of the man who still loved her so much, so much that he was ready to protect her only son with all the strength he had. From the evil headmaster his character takes a turn and becomes the most intense character in the book. He becomes more than just Severus Snape trying to bring down Harry Potter.

19 years later, Harry Potter while leaving his son to embark on the same journey which he had started when he was 11, told him ‘Albus Severus Potter, you have been named after two headmasters of Hogwarts and one of them was the bravest man I ever knew’ and he was right when he said that Severus Snape, was indeed the bravest man anyone ever knew.

Professor Severus Snape didn’t die in vain, he died for love and to die for love is the best way to go.

DREAMS

'she closed her eyes to see his face all she could see was his shadow and nothing more'

‘Dreams’- a word with so many interpretations, with so many directions. Dreams can be the one seen while sleeping and dreams can be the one aspired to be achieved. A word is just a word; the meaning of that word makes it beautiful. The meaning of the word dreams makes it lively, makes it so extraordinary, it’s not just a word, it’s an experience worth risking and then the question comes up how far are you going to stretch yourself to live that dream?

The most common conflict within a person is to choose between their dream and love and then the question of love comes up. What do you actually mean by love? Everyone has their own subjective interpretation of this word, the word is just the same, the meaning differs from person to person and it’s the meaning that changes the whole perception of a word. When you have too many options, it is hard to choose, but when the choice is between living your dream and having the one you love, the mind and heart are in a constant fight. Alone with love one cannot be happy and alone with dreams one cannot be satisfied. If the dream is not shared with someone you love, that dream is not worth living. The best dreams are lived when that someone special is right beside you holding your hand and is happy for you.

Are dreams worth fighting for? If we didn’t have dreams we would not have goals and we would never move forward, we would be stuck in a non traffic zone constant and confused. Even in our worst of times, dreams are capable of getting a smile on our face, so maybe dreams are worth fighting for ,Would you give up everything to live that dream? Then would that dream be worth living for? When everything in life is utterly wrong and sad we feel we don’t have anything worth living for but that happens when a dream shatters, when it’s broken beyond repair we give up, we forget that if one dream breaks the other one can be made, that is the beauty of dreams. They are never constant and they never let us are constant, they keep us moving, pushing us to our maximum limits, fighting, arguing, winning and losing.

Dreams do not make us, we make them. Why let a dream overpower us so much that when it breaks it hurts us beyond comparison? Maybe because to achieve that teeny tiny little dream, a mountain worth of effort was put in, but if the effort was good enough then why did it fail? It didn’t, it just made us realize our own mistakes and gave us a chance to correct them. It’s not about having the right dream, the right effort, the right outcome; it’s about taking that leap of faith again and again to dream again and again, to rise above all the failures and to make mistakes again.

‘Dreams are beautiful, they are pretty and they make us who we are’

SONG FOR THE HEART

'Slowly she was giving up, she couldn't get through him, he was in love with someone else and she was trying to make a way in, now she started realizing, it was pointless, as useless as it could be, he was more than a friend but still somewhere just a friend'


Hold on little heart
Don’t stop beating so soon
There is more to life
Than you can imagine
There is a sun that rises
There is a moon that shines

It’s not too late for you
So wake up and breathe again
Let the darkness go away
And light make its way
You can’t grow numb so soon
Feelings are a part of you

Why do you feel so much pain?
Why do you feel so much joy?
Make a new way
Feel something more
Nobody is going away
Nobody is leaving you alone

Hear the words of the brain
It sometimes makes sense
I know you fight with it a lot
But at least it cares enough
To make you find a way

Don’t love so much
Don’t think about breaking down
In my eyes you will live
No matter how much pain
So don’t slow down so soon

Have a little faith in me
Don’t try to express so much
I know you want to let it go
Don’t try so hard to
Try to make a wish
Maybe it might come true

I am talking to you
Trying to keep you awake
Don’t sleep so soon
My dying heart
Open your eyes
You still got so much more

There is a string
Binding you and me
I feel when you feel
I cry when you cry
Don’t worry
You haven’t let me down

I promise not to blame you
I promise to fathom
I promise to just be there
Little heart, I love you
Wake up, wake up to a new sunrise

THE FIRST EMOTION

it's a feeling I want to remember, the first of everything is always memorable

Bright, happy eyes looked at me,
They had a mystery unsolved,
I was hooked,
Your innocence was intriguing

It’s not every day,
That I find a smile so fascinating,
I had found a reason to stay,
I had found a reason to stop and stare

In the midst of the crowd,
It was easy to find you,
And then I wondered,
It could be a trivial possibility of a cue

When you walked,
You made heads turn,
When you smiled,
You made everyone smile

I remember the time,
When I passed you and you turned,
The feeling so sublime,
Something inside me churned

You stood afar,
Glaring at me,
How could my thoughts be not bizarre?
How could I be blithe?

It was a feeling,
I had not felt in so long,
You made me smile,
You kept making me look at you,
Again and again

Perfection was in your eyes,
It made me see dreams once more,
Perfection was in your smile,
It made me believe in life once more

When I first looked at you,
I knew you were here to stay,
My intuition came out to be true,
And you really stayed...